Question Time in the House Of Representatives: A Digest

An average day in the Australian House of Representatives...

HARRY JENKINS (SPEAKER): Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooorder. OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOrder! The Member for...THE Member for Sturt...THE MEMBER for Sturt will resume his seat! The Member for Outhaus has the call.

LIBERAL QUESTIONER: Thank you Mr Speaker. My question is to the Treasurer. Will the Treasurer please confirm for the House that he is not wearing a wig?

LIBERAL MEMBERS: *nodding* Hear hear!

WAYNE SWAN (TREASURER): I thank the member for his question. Now...

CHRISTOPHER PYNE (MEMBER FOR STURT, MANAGER OF OPPOSITION BUSINESS): Mr SpEAker, point of orrrder!

SPEAKER: *sigh* The Treasurer will resume his seat, Manager of Opposition Business on a Point of Order.

PYNE: Mr Speaker, I draw your attention to an obscure ruling you made on Standing Order 20000(c), part (i), line 73...

SPEAKER: The Manager of Opposition Business will resume his seat, there is no point of Order. Members, I remind ALL of you not to pay attention to the Standing Orders, so can I bore you to tears with rules during Question Time. The Treasurer has the call.

SWAN: Thank you Mr Speaker. Now, I don't think that the question is about my hairpiece. It's about the wonderful things...

PYNE: MR SPEAKER! POINT OF ORDER!

MEMBERS: *shouting* SIT DOWN, SHUT UP!

SPEAKER: Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooder! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORder! The Treasurer will resume his seat...

And so forth.

Meanwhile, in the Senate...

PENNY WONG (MINISTER FOR SOMETHING TO DO WITH THE ENVIRONMENT): And yessssss, Mr Pressssident, we will be...taking many...precautions in the future...

THE REST OF THE CHAMBER: *snoring*